I’ve got a confession to make. My title includes “Director,” but sometimes, my leadership approach can resemble that of the anxious plastic dinosaur Rex from Toy Story. He and I don’t like confrontation.
Here’s the deal. I don’t want to be the reason you feel small. I want you to be motivated. I want to foster your sense of self-worth. I want you to feel good about the work you’re doing.
But can we cut through the bullshit for a second? I used the word “you” in all of those sentences, but they’re not about you. Not really. All those statements that I totally believe? Yeah, they’re all actually about me.
As a creative director, being nice is actually pretty selfish.
I may think I’m protecting your feelings. But I’m really just protecting mine. I don’t want to feel like a jerk. And, in the end, it’ll backfire. Guaranteed.
Here’s the harsh truth: sugar-coating, in the long run, does no favors. We might all get along, but at what cost? When we look back at our work in the future, it’s the quality and impact that will matter, not the niceties we exchanged.
Perhaps there's a deeper truth about confrontation that many of us overlook. Confrontation, when done with care and genuine intention, can be an act of profound trust and faith in someone’s capabilities.
I won't lie. My aversion to confrontation is deep-seated. It's naive to think I’ll wake up tomorrow, magically transformed, ready to embrace the uncomfortable. But here's what I can and will change: my perspective.
I’m going to double down on selfishness.
Cause if there’s one thing I want more than to not feel like a jerk, it’s to make the best possible work.
And if I hired you, it was become you said you want the same.
So tomorrow - and I’m writing this mostly to remind myself - when I explain why the work isn’t good enough, I’m not saying “you’re not good enough”.
I’m saying “I believe you can make this better.” Because if I didn’t believe you could improve the work, I wouldn’t feedback at all. I would just brief someone else.
Comments